Lots and lots of talk(s)
Wow maintaining a blog is hard!
Over the last few months Iāve had the pleasure to present and moderate many talks in both community and academic settings, it was an honour to present at the University of Houston earlier this fall and I was thrilled to join my old friend Frank at the Montreal Anarchist Bookfair on a panel a few weeks back. Not to mention the talk with my publisher at the Vancouver Art Book Fair this summer. Each time I present something I think this would be a good post to write up. But finding the time is hard and the moment passes and the ideas and impulse fade. Doing the talks themselves takes a lot of energy, and my approach is pretty improvisational, so I donāt have much to refer back to aside from some slides and sketched out talking points. Last weekend I tabled at an amazing edition of Expozine, and I recently had to document my last two years of teaching all while going through some intensive group trauma therapy over the last eight weeks (definitely for another post). So thereās lots to talk about!
These events, ideas, and issues fit into and shape my research, the process of which I would love to share (and archive) here, so every time I donāt, it feels like a lost opportunity. Iām trying not to get too down on myself for not writing things up, but this meta-challenge of writing and āmaking publicā is an interesting one. Despite my anxiety, Iāve managed to get pretty comfortable and confident speaking publicly over the years, so why doesnāt this translate into writing? Why are the words so precious (when placed on the screen or the page)? Itās not like this blog has an audience (thank you so much for reading!) and I donāt think I am actually nervous or feeling vulnerable about getting my ideas out there? Is it just a matter of time and building the habit? So here I am blogging about blogging againā¦
At the start of my courses I try to attune students to the act/art of noticing. To see what draws their attention in their day to day and quickly document it, usually through photos, but sometimes also text. We then look at our collection and try to find patterns and meanings together.
Maybe this would be a better way to approach this blog. When I write, I think too often Iām trying to make an argument, or more accurately a string of arguments. It needs a compelling last sentence. Should I try and just notice it instead?